Cutout Cowboy

I left work Friday and drove over to Heifers N' Bulls for a drink.  I parked my old Toyota out back, that way the cops don't take note of me leaving and when.  It had been a tough day sacking groceries, and I just couldn't deal with the missus and the kids.  I got my hat off the back seat and went into the bar, Junior Brown was on the jukebox and Larry behind the bar had a beer and a shot waiting for me.  I was in hock up to my ears at the money store and the car needed a new transmission, but that could wait.  It was payday and I needed a little R & R.  I was wearing tennis shoes 'cause my feet hurt and I can't dance nohow.  I talked with the guys I know and a few women I didn't, they were all snooty bitches and just walked away.  Back in high school they would have loved to make it with the second string winning quarterback but now I guess they can smell broke a mile away.  About midnight I called home but whoever answered hung up on me, I said the hell with it and had a few more shots.  I don't remember leaving but I sure as shitcakes remember waking up in that damn car with a headache the size of the Astrodome.  I was dog ass sick and my wallet was gone.  Some joker had let the air out of my back tires so I had to walk the three miles home, I was worn out hot and tired when I got to the trailer.  There was a note from the old ball and chain duct taped to the door that said she was taking the kids and going back to her husband, and a note from Mr. Williams that owns the trailer saying I was a bum and needed to be gone Monday or else.  The door wasn't locked and some of the local teenagers had had themselves a party, I shoved the beer cans off the couch and took a nap.  I dreamed of the time I threw a 40 yard pass with one second left on the clock and almost won the game.  I would have won too if that idiot had caught the ball.  Towards evening I woke up and had a Schlitz while watching the sun set.  I got more problems than you can shake a stick at and the beer was warm.
I sure wish a hard working guy like me could get a break.